Listening to the Voices in My Head

The Covid-19 self isolation/Quarantine has had little or no impact on my life. Who knew that my life has been 'self isolation' since last year? 

Family: All is well! No one sick, no one hurt. Everyone is bored out of their skulls.. well, I'm not totally bored. VR headset is rather entertaining.

My heel, while the foot was taped, was feeling pretty good in the shoes the podiatrist told me to get.  Then, the tape came off, and the right shoe is too big. If I had a lot of money, I'd buy one pair size 9 for the right shoe, and one pair size 9 1/2 for the left shoe. I've tried a few things, with so so results, to stop the shoe from sliding up and down on the back of my heel, and not tied so tight my foot goes numb. Tried wearing thin sport sock under the regular sock, and felt ok at first, but my foot started going numb, no matter how I loosened the laces. Will have to talk to podiatrist, and physio regarding this problem. Am seeing Dr S (osteo surgeon) tomorrow. Will see what he had to say on the matter.

The padding on my chair seat is squished down to the point it feels like I'm sitting on just the frame. Went to Clark Rubber and got a square of memory foam.  It's pretty good, although it does need a bit of beveling on the front edge. It's currently residing in an old, by clean, t-shirt. My butt takes me for the cushioning. :D

Have to say stress levels are rather high. Health issue, and family issues. Wing working from home meaning we had to tiptoe around the house because he was video conferencing, or on a phone call. That also meant no vacuuming, and hoping the washing machine didn't have an unbalanced load. Thankfully, he's back to the office.

The child my eldest put up for adoption got in contact with her father, my son, last year. She got in touch with me earlier this year.  It was great to hear from her.  She is everything a 20 something young woman can be.  Unfortunately she comes with so heavy emotional baggage that I am unable to help her with sorting out.  I've been umm stressed from what she related to me. Stress, for me, causes hemi-dystonic seizures.  I really don't want to zombie myself by going back to three doses a day.  Yes, she is my grand child, but I can't deal with this right now. She is too needy, and clingy.  I'm currently seeing counselor, and that last thing I need is to take on someone else's problems at this time.

And I am of two minds as to what to do.

A few weeks ago, a photo judge allowed his personal bias to derisively dismiss and insult me and my work in a rather rude, arrogant manner (calling the photographer, me, lazy and the photo not a 'challenge’) His actions, in my opinion, were unprofessional, rude, and cruel. I came >.< this close to just putting all my gear on ebay. No joke. As it was, I just packed almost all of it away.
Turns out my husband kind of ranted about it on his own. I didn't know, I had no part in that.

Because of his rant, and in a totally creepifying move, the camera club president showed up at my door, unannounced, and proceeded to vicariously threaten me for said judge.

*I'M* the injured party, willing to just shut up and go away, and the judge is in a snit? This was a person I had respected, who turned out to be unworthy of said respect.

Ok, my choices:

1: Just brush my hands off, and let the incident fall to the past. Sounds good in theory, but to me, this not only allows but encourages him (and possibly others like him) to repeat this unprofessional behavior.

2: Mediation. His lawyer has offered mediation, and the mediator he suggested is member of photography group, one which the judge was a member of, and is probably a good friend of. Figure the odds of THAT being unbiased. Call me paranoid, but that would be as unbiased as a certain "Fair And Balanced" cable news show.

Still 2: I am intimidated and scared of said judge. I don't want to be anywhere near him, and even typing this out, the very thought of it is bringing me to tears, upsetting my stomach and making my hands shake. I don't think he realizes or cares. But you should ask my husband how much my hands were shaking when I picked up a camera a few days ago.

So, do I face him, scared spitless and wanting to throw up, or just let him slide, and allow him to do it to someone else again?