No matter how much you know what's coming, there is no easy way to handle it, is there? I'm still having trouble processing it, as he was always such a strong force of nature. Seemed unstoppable.
Of all things, I am glad I mended fences years ago. As heartbreaking as what our family is going through now, regret would have just eaten away at me had I not just let go of anger and hurt, and just moved on.
Cancer still fucking sucks.
It came back with a vengeance. My stepfather is in hospice, palliative care only. He has made the decision of pain management only, no feeding tubes, no machines, no heroic measures.
I'm.. confused at how I feel.
Part of me is 'dad is dying', and it's a kick to the gut. He was the ONLY one who comforted me when my sister died, at the wake. If it hadn't been for him, I would have lost my eldest son to drowning, and not have 4 beautiful grandchildren.
The other part... angry that he's giving in, because my mother, although with a few creaking joints, is in good health, she needs him. I know she is a tough old gal, but she needs him.
Yet another part is relieved because I know he's been fighting cancer for decades and he is TIRED. So very tired. And he deserves to rest on his own terms.
Cancer fucking sucks.
Paul Haines, a much-loved member of the Aussie specfic commuity is going through a tough time. After being diagnosed with bowel cancer, having sections of his bowel removed and enduring six months worth of chemotherapy, he has recently discovered he has spots on his liver. Paul has met this news by reloading his guns and is going to fight it with two other forms of chemotherapy for cancers like his, combined with a monoclonal antibody called Avastin. Avastin, however is not part of Medicare or the private health system's funding at this stage. It costs $20,000 to do it. Money that he doesn't have.
So we're going to try and help him raise it. Over the coming days, we're going to start outlining our plan of action. In the meantime, if you'd like to make a donation via Paypal click here: